Position is everything — and there's a reason the 69 position has attained such legendary status among sexperts, in pop culture, and where it matters most, between the sheets with the people we enjoy most. 69ing gives you and your partner complete access to each other's most sensual spots simultaneously, without either of you having to sacrifice your own pleasure. It's the optimal position for mutual oral sex — and who isn't into that?
That said, as amazing as 69ing can be, it sometimes takes a little work to get the position right — and when you're both going to town on each other, achieving that all-important synchronised rhythm isn't always easy. Here are our best tips and tricks for nailing the 69 position like an absolute pro.
If you want to go deeper on the topic of oral technique generally, our blog Mastering Oral: Tips That Will Drive Her Wild is a great companion read — everything in there applies directly to what you'll be doing in this position.
Comfort Is Key
First and foremost, being comfortable while 69ing — and really in any sexual position — is the most important factor in taking your lover where you want them to go while allowing yourself to be fully immersed in the experience. Finding the right way to position yourself on or under your partner can take a little trial and error, but once you find your personal variation, it tends to become a firm favourite.
Lying on your sides is one of the most overlooked variations of the 69 — it distributes weight evenly, eases tired muscles, and ensures both partners can reach everything they want to without straining. If the classic top-and-bottom arrangement feels uncomfortable or awkward, try the side-lying version first. Experiment freely — there's no single correct way to do this, and the best version is the one that works for your bodies.
Setting the right physical environment matters too. Our blog Tips on Seducing Without Using Words covers how to create the right atmosphere before you even get into position — small details that make a disproportionate difference to the overall experience.
Take Your Time
Patience is always important when showing your partner how much you want them — but doubly so with the 69. This is not a position designed for a lunchtime quickie. Rushing takes away from everything that makes 69ing so good in the first place. Take your time, explore, and let the experience build naturally.
Varying pressure, speed, and technique keeps both partners engaged and prevents the experience from becoming predictable. Switching from your mouth to your hands occasionally gives you a brief rest while maintaining stimulation — and adds a different texture to the experience that your partner will appreciate. And if your partner pauses momentarily to absorb a wave of particularly intense sensation, let them. Everything comes back around.
Understanding what each of you responds to most is central to making this work. Our blog Zero in on Erogenous Zones to Unleash More Pleasure During Sex is worth a read before your next session — knowing where to focus your attention changes everything.
Be Creative
Creativity and variety are the cornerstones of great sex in any position — and 69 is no exception. Knowing your partner's turn-ons and working them into your technique is what separates a good experience from a genuinely memorable one. Don't be afraid to really go for it. Lick, suck, explore — pay attention to what makes your partner moan a little louder and lean into it.
If 69ing is already your go-to position, it might be time to introduce something new into the mix. Adding a toy to the equation — a vibrator against the clitoris, a butt plug for added fullness, or a couples vibrator worn during the position — completely transforms what's already a great experience. Browse our vibrators collection and couples toys collection for options that integrate seamlessly into oral play.
Adding lube to a 69 session is also highly recommended — it enhances every sensation and makes the whole experience smoother for both partners. Browse our lubricants collection for flavoured and body-safe options perfect for oral play.
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Final Thoughts
By following these simple tips you'll be nailing the 69 position like a pro in no time. Comfort, patience, creativity, and a genuine willingness to tune into your partner's responses — that's the formula. Everything else is just practice, and this is very much the kind of practice worth putting in.
For more ways to enhance your oral game and mutual pleasure, our blog Ladies: 3 Ways to Make Your Orgasms Better is a great next read alongside this one.
Browse our full range at Romantix.com and if you have any questions, contact us — we're always happy to help, judgment free.
